I have a confession, homeschooling sucked this year. This was not a good school year for us. I had a lot of moments filled with frustration and I was overwhelmed by a combination of things.
This was my first year really homeschooling two kids at different levels (a first and third grade) while having three other little wild kids running around. My days were full of disruptions and exhaustion. Kids are relentlessly getting into everything and the house is a constant mess. I tried getting rid of a bunch of stuff and doing major cleanups but it seemed impossible to maintain. Due to the lack of sleep (completely own fault), I was irritable and probably a little on the depressed side. I can list a ton of excuses: we had bouts of sickness, holidays, too tired, pregnancy, and then my miscarriage. Some of these are valid excuses but I took advantage of the situations and too much time off from doing school then what was really necessary.
Nothing went according to plan in our studies. I completely forgot about a writing curriculum with Bradley that we didn’t even start it. We basically dropped history. Genevieve isn’t even halfway through math and the list can go on and on. I kept thinking “maybe I can start this thing back up” but then fail.
I had this picturesque vision of how our homeschool vision would be and it was completely not the reality.
I was so consumed with disappointment with myself, I felt like I was letting my kids down, and the panic of my kids being extremely behind all because of me was overwhelming. Then I came to the realization that I just needed to let it go and cut my losses for the year. More importantly, I needed to put my trust in God, stop beating myself up, learn from my mistakes, and find the joy in the sufferings.
My biggest mistake was not surrendering myself, my children, and my homeschooling to God sooner. I definitely need to work on my pride. I can also recognize the other big issue was the lack of consistency due to no structure/routine. Working on a more consistent routine is my number one goal for the year.
With all this said, even though I am cutting my losses, I’m still counting my blessings.
Although I can think of a massive list of what went wrong, there was good that came out this year too. I lost sight of the positive because I was too focused on the negative. Here are some of the things that have been going well in our homeschool:
- We all learned a lot of life lessons. Especially when I went through my miscarriage.
- The kids are learning perseverance. When things get tough and they are learning to take a step back and figure how to fix it.
- Bradley did a whole level of math and already has a third of the next level finished.
- Genevieve is doing really well with her reading, despite us not being where I was hoping.
So what now?
The plan from here on out is to do the bare minimum for the next month/ month and a half to get them ready for their end of the year testing and to start the next school year this summer with a fresh start. I’m going to (at least try) to stop worrying about what didn’t get done and what should have happened and just move on. I am currently planning out the next school year and getting my house cleaned up and ready to go.
So here’s to cutting my losses with their current grades, counting my blessings, and moving on to hopefully a better homeschool year.
How is your school year going?